Contained within this independently published Steam guide is a series of gambits, tactics, and strategies that the clever and well-educated player of FPS Chess may find as fascinating, intriguing, or even “please you’re not allowed at the chess club anymore just get out,” as the kids always seem to call it.
Additionally, I must declare that I am morally and legally obligated to inform you, the reader, that I absolutely and un-apologetically suck at chess. As such, I strongly reccomend that you do not tell the chess police that I am blissfully unaware as to the exact definition of a “gambit.”
The Gravity Gun Surprise
As any decent FPS Chess player may know, one of the queen piece’s abilities allow her to pick up extraneous chess pieces on the board and “yeet” them in the direction of her enemies, often resulting in a fatal blow.
A very, how should I say it, “Viable…” strategy is to, at the genesis of a duel in which you are in control of a queen piece, rapidly and violently collect and deposit your adjacent king piece into your opponent, resulting in a near instantaneous victory on your part, followed by a near comical physics-driven expiration animation of your foe.
The Rocket Jump
The Bishop’s holy hand grenade not only sports minimal self-inflicted damage, but also a quaintly short cooldown. This allows for a bishop to propel themselves upwards from controlled explosions, in a manner comparable to the rather well-known “Team Fortress Two.”
(pictured: an esteemed rocketeer soaring through the air with all of the grace of a blimp-borne eagle, as Abraham Lincoln intended.)
The Minecraft Elytra
In addition to the holy bishop’s throwable of combustion, they also sports the ability of gracefully flying through the air.
By activating our bishop’s non-grenade ability whilst descending and observing the ground simultaneously, they are able to gain the wings of an angel, and gracefully soar in a manner complaint with areal physics, and the fabled elytra, from Minecraft.
Do take heed, however, that attempting to fly to the heavens without momentum will result in what many areonauts refer to as a “you utter fool why did you pull up on the handle we are going to crash,” also known as a stalling out. Upon the occurrence of this, you will now rapidly descend to the earth in all of your wingless non-glory, just as I did upon dooming my flight instructor back in 1910.
“Work In Progress”
It is of upmost importance that I declare this guide remains in a nature some would describe as a “work in progress.” I ferverently implore the thoughtful reader to re-view this guide from time to time, as there may be additional tactics, strategies, and perhaps even gambits available for analysis.
Additionally, additional entries may also appear with the insight of a fellow esteemed connoisseur by the name of Drep.
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